It occurred to me while I was standing in a very long check out line at the Pure Hockey tent sale this weekend, my arms filled with random hockey ‘stuff’ (everything was 20% off and we would need it eventually right?) surrounded by hundreds of other parents, their arms filled with random hockey ‘stuff’ – I was officially a “hockey mom”. I’m not sure when this transition happened exactly, but there was no other explanation for why it felt perfectly normal to be there, by my own choice, on a beautiful August (yes, August) Saturday afternoon, looking around for people I knew.

So that got me to thinking. How did this happen? How did I get here? Didn’t I swear at some point that Ryan would never play hockey because it was too dangerous? Not to mention I have always heard that the practices were really early in the morning and there was no way I was getting up early to sit in a cold hockey rink? At what point did I lose this battle?

It started innocently enough – or maybe I falsely remember having a say in the matter when really this was all a big conspiracy between Mike and my brother Gary. Ryan would ‘learn how to skate’ with his cousin Ashton. And, oh by the way, he will need hockey skates (I think the first pair were a gift from Mike’s parents so they must have been in on it too), and a hockey helmet. And some gloves, shin and elbow guards in case he fell. Hmmm… this is starting to sound more like ‘Learn to Play Hockey’ than ‘Learn to Skate’. I was assured that he would not be skating with a stick and you can’t learn how to play hockey without a stick right, so I went along with it. It was November, 2010 and Ryan was four years old.

Our journey began at The Groton School with P.A.T. Hockey. Ryan is handed a hockey jersey that is much, much too large for him (wait – why does he have to wear a hockey jersey? This isn’t hockey, it is ‘learn to skate’!). The trap has been set.

Anyone who knows me knows that when I start a sport, or anything new really, I have to have all of the right equipment. (Example: I decided to learn to mountain bike, and went out and bought a really nice mountain bike. This was years ago. The bike hangs in my garage, the paint still a nice shiny red.) I noticed that some of the kids had on ‘stuff’ under their hockey jersey, that makes the jersey fit a little better. I asked Mike about it. He said they are wearing hockey pants and chest guards. Well, why isn’t Ryan wearing those things? If all the other kids are wearing them he must need them right? And so later that afternoon we would buy Ryan hockey pants and chest guards. He would now be learning how to skate in full blown hockey gear. Everything but the stick. I walked right into the trap without even realizing it.

All the kids – 3,4, 5 years old – were set loose on the ice at once, many of them on skates for the first time in their young lives. Ashton caught on pretty quick and could at least stand and shuffle along, and stay upright most of the time. And when he did fall, he could pick himself back up. Ryan not so much. He spent much of that first day crawling on the ice, crying, wanting to come off. He and a few other kids were allowed to come off the ice to learn some ‘skills’ that will help them on the ice. They started waddling around on their skates, quacking like ducks. Really?

I would spend the next six months of Sundays sitting in that cold rink at The Groton School watching Ryan ‘learn to skate’ in hockey gear. It was cute, really – and that was the downfall right there. I was lured by the cuteness of it all – Ryan dressed head to toe in hockey gear, looking like a mini hockey player (without the stick). The highlight of that first year? When Ryan was able to (finally!) stand up on the ice by himself when he fell. That deserves a medal, right?

Fast forward, almost four years later and I find myself fully engulfed in the hockey world. Ryan no longer plays in Groton, and instead plays at a rink much closer to our home. (An added bonus is that this rink also has a built-in restaurant and seating outside the ice so you don’t have to freeze all the time). After that first year, they added the stick, and Ryan was officially ‘playing hockey’.

Over the last four years, we have transitioned from having slushies after our once weekly hockey session to eating dinner at the rink multiple times a week in between hockey skills sessions, practices and games. (I am convinced there is a conspiracy between the rink restaurant and the ice scheduling that forces us to spend hours at the rink at a time.) I now know the exact location of all 7 rinks in the arena Ryan plays at, and which locker rooms go with each rink. And I get overly excited when I get a good parking spot at the rink – on some days, it is the highlight of my day.

And I’ve learned a few things about hockey along the way.

I’ve learned that the hockey season never ends. It starts in the Fall, and then starts again the next Fall. It. Never. Ends.

I’ve learned that you do eventually get used to the cold… and the smell.

I’ve learned that hockey tryouts are much harder on the parents then they are on the kids. Much, much harder.

I’ve learned the value of ice time. It is SO valuable in fact that hockey parents will often rent a full sheet of ice – outside of regular ice time – because, we don’t already spend enough time on the ice.

I’ve learned the importance of the “blue line”. It doesn’t just divide the you know. That blue line is REALLY important.

I’ve since learned that there are actually two blue lines. And both blue lines are REALLY important.

I’ve learned that there are two different doors to the hockey team bench – one for offense and one for defense. Who knew?

I’ve learned that I will no longer refer to Ryan as 6 years old or 7 years old or whatever age he happens to be when I am asked his age. He is now and always will be, an ’06’.

I’ve learned that nothing will stop your heart faster than watching your child go down on the ice and not get up right away.

I’ve learned that the game of hockey is teaching Ryan so much more than stick handling skills and edge work. He is learning about sportsmanship, teamwork, commitment, hard work, successes and failures – things that all sports teach you, but I think hockey does so on a much larger scale.

I’ve learned that the hockey community is made up of some really great people. We’ve made some great friends along the way, especially over the last year. There is nothing that will bond you faster then spending hours and hours at a hockey rink together (including six consecutive nights of hockey tryouts). Ryan has made some great friends too and it has been fun to watch his little group of friends grow in the sport.

I have no idea how long I will be a “hockey mom” – that will be up to Ryan. For now, I am just going to enjoy the adventure. I am very proud of him and I am excited to see what the next year has in store for him and for us.